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Let's Panic: The Book!

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How to Endure and Possibly Triumph Over the Adorable Tyrant
who Will Ruin Your Body, Destroy Your Life, Liquefy Your Brain,
and Finally Turn You
into a Worthwhile
Human Being.

Written by Alice Bradley and Eden Kennedy

Some Books
I'm In...

Sleep Is
For The Weak

Chicago Review Press

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Let's Panic

The site that inspired the book!

At LET'S PANIC ABOUT BABIES, Eden Kennedy and I share our hard-won wisdom and tell you exactly what to think and feel and do, whether you're about to have a baby or already did and don't know what to do with it. → 

« This one's for you, YOUMAKEMESICK. | Main | Actually we're decorating the tree with Legos. »

Just another ethical debate during dinner.

Henry: What are you eating?

Me: A chicken leg.

Henry: You're eating the leg of a chicken.

Me: That's right.

Henry: Meat is animals.

Me: ….yeah.

Henry: Someone cut the leg off a chicken and now you're eating it.

Me: Yeeaaah. Hey, Henry, maybe you don't eat meat because you're a vegetarian.

Henry: What's a vegetablerian?

Me: Someone who doesn't eat meat. Maybe you don't eat meat because you don't like the idea of killing animals.

Henry: I don't like meat.

Me: Right. Because you don't want animals to die, maybe.

Henry: No, I don't mind. I don't mind at all if chickens die. I just don't like them.

Me: So it's not for moral reasons.

Henry: I don't like morals, either.

Reader Comments (44)

December 4, 2007 | Unregistered Commenternate
I absolutely agree with Henry! You cannot beat the logic of 4-year olds. It's impenetrable. George W. Bush could take lessons from Henry...maybe he can be a consultant. Just a thought...
December 4, 2007 | Unregistered CommenterStacy
lol - those weird little peeks into their working brains is wild.

The meat-is-animals things seems to have gone over pretty well. Not so much at our house, when my daughter had shrimp and asked,

“this is its tail? And did it curl up to protect itself before it died? Like an armadillo?”

Annnnnnnd that's right about the start of our new mostly vegetarian diet.
December 4, 2007 | Unregistered Commenteranne nahm
People who are vegetarians because they just think meat is gross are called "aesthetic vegetarians." At least, according to George Bernard Shaw. I was one myself from ages 12-14 and 17-20. My downfall has always been salami, which calls me with its uniquely garlicky siren's song from across delis and buffet tables. I guess I should have compromised by being a salamitarian.
December 4, 2007 | Unregistered CommenterMagrak
You can always get away with hiding morals under a cheese sauce.
December 4, 2007 | Unregistered CommenterDeb on the Rocks
I want the magical bacon plant.
December 4, 2007 | Unregistered CommenterLisa Milton
I have a little "vegetablearian" who is terrified of chickens (traumatic petting-zoo experience -- don't ask) and gleefully talks about how other people kill and eat them, even though she wouldn't dream of eating one herself. If she ever became a meat-eater, it'd be strictly for revenge.

Incidentally, I, too, thought meat was gross when I was Henry's age. I quit it altogether when I was in college and am now in my 17th year of non-meat-eating, so you never know where these early dinner-table comments will lead!
December 4, 2007 | Unregistered CommenterVanessa
Maybe he thought you meant morels-- do you all do a lot of gourmet mushroom cooking? I don't like them much myself, really!
December 5, 2007 | Unregistered CommenterMara
I'm not a big LOL-er, but that one got me!
December 5, 2007 | Unregistered CommenterRuthWells
Ha, that could have been a converstaion between myself and my 10 yr old. Although I would have described the chicken as a poor sweet feathery chick who wanted nothing more than to live.
December 5, 2007 | Unregistered CommenterStrizz
Stop it! Stop making me want to have kids. I know the chances of having a Henry of my own is very slim. Your kid is so brilliant.

And the magical bacon plant made me snort. I wish I had one right now.
December 5, 2007 | Unregistered CommenterDM
Ha ha ha ha! Ha! Henry needs to have his own show, like Truman.
December 5, 2007 | Unregistered CommenterSue
Those morals were effing delicious.
December 5, 2007 | Unregistered Commenterthe other leslie
Why won't he eat meat??? Or, I should say, please get to the bottom of this and tell me so I can figure out why my kid won't eat meat!!! Stat. We are running out of beige tasteless foods...
December 6, 2007 | Unregistered CommenterMignon
Sign seen at a Northern Wisconsin Fishing Resort: "There's room for all of God's creatures...right next to the mashed potatoes"

December 6, 2007 | Unregistered Commenterbadmamasmama
I don't know who's funnier. You, Henry, or your commenters. You have a great crew who show up here! And you and Henry ain't too bad either. ;)
December 6, 2007 | Unregistered CommenterAuthorMomWithDogs
I love it! A kid with convictions without morals. Like my daughter who spews forth "Fish are our friends, not our food", and "poor little fishies." She just hates fish, that's all.
December 6, 2007 | Unregistered CommenterShellie
Ewww... morals.
December 6, 2007 | Unregistered CommenterTammy
man thats so funny....the dinner table is usally a place of funny stories.

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