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How to Endure and Possibly Triumph Over the Adorable Tyrant
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Written by Alice Bradley and Eden Kennedy

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At LET'S PANIC ABOUT BABIES, Eden Kennedy and I share our hard-won wisdom and tell you exactly what to think and feel and do, whether you're about to have a baby or already did and don't know what to do with it.

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« A few things while my brain slowly dies. | Main | Why gyms are no good. No good at all. »
Thursday
Mar162006

If this doesn’t brighten your day, then whoops, you have no soul.

This, my friends, is why having a child is a worthwhile endeavor: yes, it’s hard, and it’s smelly, and you miss all that sleep you used to get. And then the years pass, and you have to deal with grades, and heartaches, and driving tests. But then! (Stay with me, here.) Then one day you wake up, and your behemoth of a man-child has left a CD for you, and you listen to this song that he wrote. And you realize that however big you thought your boy’s heart is, it’s actually ten times bigger. (Metaphorically speaking.)

If you’re even luckier, though, you get your reward early—say, when your child is three and a half, and you hear the song that your nephew wrote for your little boy.

(Incidentally, I have two nephews, both of whom are too amazing to be true—I think they may in fact be holograms—but, ahem, only one of them wrote a song for Henry. So, Dave, if you want equal airtime, may I suggest an oil portrait? Or how about a little interpretative dance? Just a thought.)

Here, without further ado, is “Underwater Batman (Song for Henry).”

(EDITED TO ADD: Hey, do you see the link up at the upper right? The one that casually suggests that you might want to take a survey? This is from the people at Blogads, and will help me get more money in the future, so I won't whine as much about my lack of money. If you could take it, that would be nice. Okay. Thank you.)

Reader Comments (105)

Okay. I cried.

I loved that Henry is going to "go with him to read some books in the library some day!"

outstanding.
March 16, 2006 | Unregistered CommenterLizRM
He must go to an excellent preschool. They talk about metacognition and postmodernism and foie gras and other things I know nothing about.Or maybe he's been watching public TV college courses.
March 16, 2006 | Unregistered CommenterEuropean
Great song, what a sweet nephew. That survey is wacked-out, though.

"16. Why do you blog?X To smite my enemies."

So much restraint needed.

"26. Blogs are:X Bigger than the Beatles."

Uh huh.
March 16, 2006 | Unregistered CommenterD.
Well, if you're going to provide such heart-snuggling background music, of course I'll do the survey.

Thanks for the sweet (literally) tune.
March 16, 2006 | Unregistered CommenterVaguely Urban
:) Okay okay, I took time out of my crazy existence with the five little pirates to delurk and leave you a comment. That song was great!

I did the survey too, which kept going on for pages and pages, but it wasn't too bad. Can you tell me more about Blog Ads?

Cheers!
March 16, 2006 | Unregistered CommenterDana
Gosh, first the "Babe" video, and now this...just too cute! I agree, "Underwater Batman" is a very catchy song.Do you know what would be the perfect completion to this series of heart aching cuteness? - A video of Henry dancing with the "Crazy Dancers"!That story always brings a smile to my face. My son is only 5 months old so he can't dance with the crazy dancers yet...but even he is intrigued by them.
March 16, 2006 | Unregistered CommenterCarrie
Am I dumb? I can't hear it. Agggh!
March 16, 2006 | Unregistered CommenterSchnozz
Uh, he does sound hot. Does he live in New York? Is he single? Did I actually ask that?
March 16, 2006 | Unregistered CommenterJenna
Oh, that's wonderful. And I took the survey, too.
March 16, 2006 | Unregistered CommenterCaryn
Okay! that was awesome. I'm so smiling like a goof! ;D
March 16, 2006 | Unregistered CommenterFaith
Big dude sounds eerily like Jack Johnson. And Underwater Batman? Could totally kick Aqua Man's ass.

This is awesome.
March 16, 2006 | Unregistered CommenterTB
I started to fill out your survey, then I read the first series of questions and got totally depressed. I'm now in a new age bracket. Thank God you redeemed yourself by also including that wonderful song "Underwater Batman" Totally cheered up an otherwise glum blogging experience.
March 16, 2006 | Unregistered CommenterSteph
The song is fantastic! I guess brilliance and awesomeness just run in your family.

Lucky.
March 16, 2006 | Unregistered CommenterEmily G.
What an awesome song!

I think my 19 month old daughter is now in love with Henry. When Henry started talking, she stopped playing, put her head down on my laptop, and said something that sounded very much like "I love". Then she smiled and clapped to the song.

So so so cute.
March 16, 2006 | Unregistered Commenterspondmom
Oh! I don't have the words to express how much I love that song.
March 16, 2006 | Unregistered CommenterNichole
Hoo boy. I'm completely sold on the unrelenting cuteness. And yes, your nephew sounds completely hot.
March 16, 2006 | Unregistered CommenterJemima
real tears. so, so sweet! such talent. metacognition blew mw away too.
March 16, 2006 | Unregistered Commenteraarin
Unfortunately, my soul is dead. But. Oh God, I do love the song. I think I might have to come back and relentlessly play it. (And look for the metacognition part.) The riffs Henry does are utterly brilliant. He's a little surrealist poet. I especially like the part where he sings "that's the end of the song."
March 16, 2006 | Unregistered Commenterozma
Henry says something like "That's what... metacognition is ... maybe you can just call it metacognition." Does metacognition mean "being friends with Underwater Batman"? I mean, as far as I'm concerned, it does, since I, a well-educated 33-year-old, have no idea what it actually means. Maybe he learned this word at preschool? (early SAT vocabulary drills?) Do the Rescue Heroes use Metacognition in their rescues?

Listening to this song made me want to claw at my skin to let out the cuteness, such did the sweetness of it overwhelm me. Is that messed up? I think it's bedtime...
March 16, 2006 | Unregistered CommenterS-Way
It's certainly no "Outerspace Mr. Fantastic" but I suppose it will do.
March 16, 2006 | Unregistered CommenterMom101
Pretty much what everyone else said. You have some shiny people in your life, Alice. I'm envious and happy for you.
March 16, 2006 | Unregistered Commenterkim
Aw, that was great. When is the video of it coming out? I'd like to see them swimming with Underwater Batman.
March 16, 2006 | Unregistered CommenterAnne
Wow. Your nephew is very talented. I hope he's doing thinking about recording more, if he hasn't already? Keep us up to date - I'd be downloading him off iTunes for sure.
March 17, 2006 | Unregistered Commenterworking From Home Today
I think I will sing this song for the rest of the day. Too, too sweet.
March 17, 2006 | Unregistered Commentersamantha
Yeah, so listening to that made my heart grow ten times bigger, and forced tears to come running out of my eyeballs! THANKS Finslippy nephew...I'm AT WORK!

That was beautiful!
March 17, 2006 | Unregistered CommenterLesleyMW

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