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Let's Panic: The Book!

Order your copy today!

How to Endure and Possibly Triumph Over the Adorable Tyrant
who Will Ruin Your Body, Destroy Your Life, Liquefy Your Brain,
and Finally Turn You
into a Worthwhile
Human Being.

Written by Alice Bradley and Eden Kennedy

Some Books
I'm In...

Sleep Is
For The Weak

Chicago Review Press

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Let's Panic

The site that inspired the book!

At LET'S PANIC ABOUT BABIES, Eden Kennedy and I share our hard-won wisdom and tell you exactly what to think and feel and do, whether you're about to have a baby or already did and don't know what to do with it. → 

« Give me your worst parenting stories | Main | All that was missing was some figgy pudding. »

Be good, for goodness' sake

(The following took place as we considered the three-foot-tall Santa standee my mom gave us, in revenge for not taking her festive goblets.)

Scott: I think we should put it in Henry's room all year. You know, since he's so scared of being alone.

Alice: It'll just confuse him now that the Christmas season is over. Which is why we should cloak it in a dark shroud. Then it'll be a comforting, anonymous presence, watching him from the shadows.

Scott: Or we could put it under his bed. So he always knows it's down there. Listening.

Alice: Can we rig something to knock at the underside of his bed at irregular intervals? So it's like he's reminding him, I'm under here, keeping you safe?

Scott: Or a motion-activated recording. "Ho, ho, I'm down here, and I'm watching you."

Alice: Make it a whisper, so it doesn't startle him while he's sleeping.

Reader Comments (26)

You know, he might end up getting to reliant on it. You should probably move it in and out of the room, and position it in different places whenever you can... Just so he get's used to it coming and going, and won't get so attached he's still checking for it under his bed in college.
January 6, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterLeaf, probably...

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