Ain't got no mind, etc.

Henry is seriously into Hair. Not the keratinous filaments sprouting from your head, you charming scamp! The American tribal love-rock musical! And let's get this out of the way—yes, I bought the CD of Hair: The Movie with my own well-earned money; yes, I have been known to sing along; yes, I'm a dirty hippie. But you knew that already.



I got him into Hair: The Musical: The Movie to get him out of the Jesus Christ Superstar soundtrack, which was his father’s fault, and so here we are. And yes, I know that half the songs are about sex and drugs and sex while on drugs and making drugs while having sex, but we zip right past those songs. I do allow the occasional "orgasm" or "virgin" to slip in there. I'm probably asking for trouble. But then, he's already listened to Bowie; he'll be hooked on drugs before the year is out. I'm pinning all my hopes and dreams on the cat.

Anyway, a while ago Scott pointed out that the lyrics in Hair consist almost exclusively of lists. And now this is all I can think about when I listen to Hair, which we have to do every time we're in the car. Now instead of grooving on the mellow vibes and rock-by-way-of-Broadway stylings, I can only think about the lists. The lists! Why? If Charismatic Hippie Treat Williams isn't naming his many bodily and spiritual assets, then Righteous Black Hippie is tallying the various derogatory synonyms for "black," or Nell Carter and Another Hippie Who Kind of Reminds Me Of That Guy From Ashford and Simpson are specifying all the items they do not have, which come out to quite a lot. One thing they do have in abundance: scarves. That’s why they’re so cheerful!

Because musicals often mirror reality, it’s clear to me that hippies were deeply into itemizing. It was how they kept from slipping into a hashish-induced paranoid funk. "I love a lot of things, man. Brother, I'm gonna enumerate the many things I love, while swooping around with my fan-freaky-tastic Twyla Tharp moves. Dig!"

I love peace and birds!

[kick turn lurch arabesque]

I love songs and beats and words!

[graceful fall into a pile of leaves, afro is covered in twigs, no matter!]

I love drugs and love and shit!

[entwining hands with an ambiguously ethnic, macrame-wearing woman]

I love you, let's all say "tit!"

[all the hippies fall into place]

Tit tit titty-tit tits!

Now we'll all sing about our bits!

[incoherent mumbling]

Aaaand... nipple!

War is bad! WAR IS SAD!

War is bad and sad and makes me mad!

Here are 37 more synonyms for negative feelings we have about war!

Aaaand... fade out.

This is how life was.



In conclusion, I love that movie still and you can't make me not love it, even though Treat Williams has actual caterpillars pinned above his eyes, after he lost his eyebrows in a motorcycle accident.

Comments

[Adventures In Babywearing]

I was just thinking about Hair today and how I watched the movie when I was younger... but I don't think I could ever replace JCSuperstar with that soundtrack!

Steph

[Kate]

My first job while I was in college was working at Tower Video 1987. I played Hair on the video monitor EVERY SINGLE day for two months during my shift. Two people quit because of it. Then I switched to The Sound of Music very briefly, finally switching back to Hair. God, those were good times.

[Krisco]

Even when I totally don't relate to what you're talking about, I love reading what you have to say.

I think it's those extra couple years I have on you - I think I was like four when Hair came out, so like 8 when all the local theaters were doing revivals. And, uh. Yeah. Lots of old people running around with a lot of hair. (18 yr olds looked old to me then.) Didn't get it. Maybe it's time to re-see it?

[jenB]

That gave me the biggest belly laugh. And I have a big belly. I am still shaking with all the giggling and it is making typing a problem and the cat thinks i'm nuts. Oh Alice. You should right your own enumerated list of the good things you have! I bet it would be a hoot.

[hosie]

Your description of hippies sounds a lot like most of my friends. Except they hate being called hippies, so I lie to them.

Also, that's an AWESOME movie. I saw it on TV when I was 15 and developed a huge crush on Treat Williams.

[Leslie]

Oh, so funny. I think I peed my pants a little.

[Weeze]

That movie is criminally underrated. As a nice girl from Ohio who moved to the Big City, the scene where they lead the horse out of the city-stable with the gospel choir hmmm-hmmmming in the background makes me bawl every damn time.

[effective nancy]

Gee, I've always preferred the live musical, which I realize now I've seen at least four times at different venues. The movie is weirdly confusing to me in that the visual plot and the lyrical plot don't really match up, and that Forman bypassed the incredible visual effect of the conjoined Supremes singing "White Boys."

FWIW, I grew up with Hair, JC Superstar, Evita, and A Chorus Line (with the unparalleled "Shit, Richie!" lyric) and I still have been allowed out into the world after all that indoctrination.

[Kizz]

Oh it's a dangerous spiral. Soon you'll be buying Godspell to replace Hair and from there it's only a short (but fatal) hop to the Andrew Lloyd Weber canon.

Good luck to you!

Or rather, Peace, man.

[Nicole]

It may soon be time to switch to RENT, so he can learn about sodomy. It's way more fun than crucifixion!

[merseydotes]

I love musicals for kids. Have you done Singing in the Rain yet? Petunia loves that one. And The Sound of Music, though it is really embarassing when she wants to play Let's Hide From The Nazis! in public.

If Henry is into the more modern works, maybe he'd like Tommy? Or Pippin?

Don't forget to introduce Henry to Rocky Horror Picture Show! I'm sure he would make a sweet transvestite for Halloween this year.

[MissusB]

Sodomy..fellatio....cunnilingus...pederasty...Father, why do these words sound so nasty?

I used to sing this at the top of my lungs while listenting to Hair on the record player in my room. Didn't have a clue what any of it meant. I think it shocked my Mom's bridge club however.

[You can call me, 'Sir']

I'm going to walk around yelling "SOY INVISIBLE!!!" all day today. And only the Spaniards will understand.

[Kim]

You always make me laugh, but this one I was almost crying. So funny.

[slouching mom]

Love Hair.LOVE IT.

And Treat Williams and his caterpillars, LOL!

[maggie]

We had the original Broadway cast album when I was a kid...and none of the songs were off limits. So my brother would walk around the house singing:SodomyFellatioCunnilingusPederasty

Father, why do these words sound so nasty?

MasturbationCan be funJoin the holy orgyKama SutraEveryone!

[2shews]

The best, best, best part of that post were the subtitles in Spanish along with the music. I must do a hippy scarf Martha Graham moment of celebration for YouTube right this instant.

[Antonia]

First time Esme slept all night, it was immediately after watching her first Cheech & Chong movie (Nice Dreams, for anyone out there with a sleepless baby).

Nowadays we just give her 'ludes to knock her out.

[Tracy]

Awesome...next you know, your little guy will refuse his next haircut! I'm with Steph, though...as great as Hair is, it cannot beat out JCS.

[Kori]

Hilarious! I'm definitely going to have to check that out. Aren't these little people just here for our entertainment purposes anyway? ;)

[Bonnie B.]

We watched "Hair" in my film psychology class, and I'll tell you what - your son probably appreciates the music more than that particular group of 18- to 21-year-olds did.

I think I would like to see a revival with your song included. It would definitely liven things up a bit, don't you think?

[Joe]

God that's funny. Don't forget Donnie Dacus,formerly of Chicago (the band)http://john.savage.free.fr/claude/woofberger.jpg

I remember seeing Hair - The Movie, as a kid and getting all turned on because I got to see real tits. Same with the chick in Logan's Run.http://www.ulujain.org/images/film/lr4.jpg

[Frankie]

"black boys r deliciousChocolate flavored lovelicorice lips like candykeep my coco handyI have such a sweet toothwhen it comes to love..."

Love HAIR!!

But in all these years, I never did figure out what "Pederasty" was...?

[Erin]

This cracked me up. I was obsessed with Hair in middle school and was absolutely positive I was the first to discover and love it so. My parents made me help them clean the house before family came over for a big party, so to rebel and keep it real I blasted the Hair soundtrack throughout the house. My mother then sang along to every damn word, scandalizing and permanently damaging me. I need to dig that tape up and listen to it again.

[goldfishery]

This is...wow. I see now that "Rent" is not so original. In fact, it's pretty much "Hair" with AIDS.