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Let's Panic: The Book!

Order your copy today!

How to Endure and Possibly Triumph Over the Adorable Tyrant
who Will Ruin Your Body, Destroy Your Life, Liquefy Your Brain,
and Finally Turn You
into a Worthwhile
Human Being.

Written by Alice Bradley and Eden Kennedy

Some Books
I'm In...

Sleep Is
For The Weak

Chicago Review Press

Home - Middle Row

Let's Panic

The site that inspired the book!

At LET'S PANIC ABOUT BABIES, Eden Kennedy and I share our hard-won wisdom and tell you exactly what to think and feel and do, whether you're about to have a baby or already did and don't know what to do with it. → 

« Warning: bag will contain body parts | Main | About a bird »

A list of celebrities and what they smell like

Because I think you should know.

Justin Timberlake: Vetiver, anise, llama tears
Glenn Close: Gummy bears and woodsmoke
Eric Bana: Dragonfruit smashed with a hand-rubbed mahogany desk clock
Anne Heche: Driftwood and ambergris, with notes of alligator
Tom Skerritt: Peach blossom, shrapnel, gooseberry bitters
Edie Falco: Madagascar vanilla muddled by porcelain doll feet
Peabo Bryson: The silk lining of a 19th century leather valise
Will Smith: Surprised bergamot
Selena Gomez: Leviticus 2:16
Craig T. Nelson: Juicy Fruit, civet musk, houseboats
Dianne Wiest: Peppermint-infused beard gloss
Michael Caine: A geodesic dome wrapped in handwoven butter muslin
Angelica Huston: Hematite, starfruit, irony
Jay-Z:  Absinthe diffused in a particle accelerator
Bryan Cranston: Turkish wildflowers picked during a sunshower
Emmylou Harris: Artisanal, locally sourced gyro meat
Clive Owen: Clouds

Reader Comments (43)

Love it!

And if Coty Fragrances knows what they're doing, they'll get that locally sourced gyro meat scent bottled in time for the holidays.

August 23, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterWendi

Sweet Baby Jesus (I wonder what that smells like)! This will probably be the best thing I read all day.

August 23, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterLisa

Alice, do you have synesthesia? (probably spelled that wrong)...are you able to smell these things just by conjuring up an image of these celebs? That would be cool and a bit overwhelming!

August 23, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterAngela

Love. Love.

August 23, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterIrene Ilias

No special abilities, Angela, just being humorous. Ha ha haaaargh...?

August 23, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterAlice

Please FB so I can share, honey!

August 23, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterIrene Ilias

You win. That is all.

August 23, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterAverage Jane

Pierce Brosnan: Ghirardelli chocolate truffles and wood smoke

Thank you. We'll be doing this all day now.

August 23, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterAndrea & Emma

Emmylou Harris cannot possibly smell like lamb meat, she must smell of dream meadows, frosted prozac flakes and country breeze.

August 23, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterRachel

I've met Tom Skerrit. You're totally right. ;-)

I really hope Clive smells like clouds.

August 23, 2012 | Unregistered Commentersizzle

But, what is vetiver? Google isn't even helping me. Is it like Velveeta? Velvet? Varnish?

August 23, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterKim L


August 23, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterRachel Connell

and we need to know this because....?

Well, because it is time to begin making those "Christmas" lists. You know the ones - the "don't you dare buy this for yourself before Christmas!!!" lists.

Do you have any idea what scents I need to begin blending to create Robert Pattinson?

August 23, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterChristie Critters

Tom Skerritt: Peach blossom, shrapnel, gooseberry bitters


August 23, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterKaren from Chookooloonks

I agree with Rachel re: Emmylou Harris. Where do you even GET freakin' "surprised bergamot"??? My guess, enough time in Brooklyn expands everyone's consciousness. Love reading your work, this is one to share.

August 23, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterWendy YB

That is beautiful information. Thank you. Just in case you wondered, Ryan Adams smells like weed & warm butt.

August 23, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterRobin Plemmons

If you tell me you can write this way without any sort of outside help (wine or weed) I will die of the jealousies. (like, ALL the types)


August 24, 2012 | Unregistered Commenteralexandra

Surprised bergamot, as opposed to trifle-annoyed bergamot?

August 24, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterRachel

I don't know how you do it. This is so full of every kind of win there is.

August 24, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterKatherine Stone

Did you make this up? This is one of the best things I've read in months. You are amazing.

August 24, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterVictoria

Victoria, it's what I know in my heart.

August 24, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterAlice

I have a tumblr "Sniffer Doodle" that does this too

August 24, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterNita

Choosing a favorite is a futile Sophie's choice ... I am begging you ... celebrity colors next.

August 24, 2012 | Unregistered Commenterdianne

You're my favorite.

August 24, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterJachel

Whimsy becomes you.

August 24, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterMagpie

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