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Let's Panic: The Book!

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How to Endure and Possibly Triumph Over the Adorable Tyrant
who Will Ruin Your Body, Destroy Your Life, Liquefy Your Brain,
and Finally Turn You
into a Worthwhile
Human Being.

Written by Alice Bradley and Eden Kennedy

Some Books
I'm In...

Sleep Is
For The Weak

Chicago Review Press

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Let's Panic

The site that inspired the book!

At LET'S PANIC ABOUT BABIES, Eden Kennedy and I share our hard-won wisdom and tell you exactly what to think and feel and do, whether you're about to have a baby or already did and don't know what to do with it. → 

« Have you been half-asleep? AND HAVE YOU HEARD VOICES? | Main | Hey, dawn? I got a rosy finger for you RIGHT HERE. »

Wherein I abandon my values and family for pretty, pretty money.

So it seems that I have taken a job. Just like that. I swore a while ago that I would be all freelance-y and free-spirit-y forever and ever, that I would never again sit in a cubicle and be oppressed by the Man, and then the Man called and said, "Here's some money for you," and I said, "Hey, freelance life? Go sit at the curb until someone picks you up, because I want me some cash."

Yesterday I went to a meeting! In an office! A meeting where no one had yogurt smearings (smearings?) on their shoulders from their kids gnawing at their shirts, where people had Blackberries and wore pumps and slacks and ties (not all on one person, you understand) and seemed to not want to burst into hysterical giggles at the silliness of it all. And then they went, "We'll pay you! To do this thing!" And I was like "No shit!" and they were all "We totally mean it!" and so here I am, now, with a sort-of job. I mean, it's not a full-time job, and it's only for a year (a YEAR!) but now I have all this work, so, hmm.

Of course, Henry will have something to say about all this. I've come to see that kids take up a lot of time and energy, and he probably wouldn't understand it if I told him to play quietly until Mummy came home at 6 pm. So there's that. I'll have to get some help. Because we are still poor (until the cash money comes a-rolling in, YEE HAW), help will probably come in grandparental form, with all the psychic damage that implies. Not damage to him, of course--oh, he'll be just peachy.

I'm not sure what all this means for the blog. In addition to the job, there's my fiction writing, which has been woefully neglected, as I am addicted to the instant gratification of blogging. But attention must be paid, my friends. Attention must be paid! Then there's, you know, life. I can't just give up on the blog, I think, right? I can't. I will find a way. (Cue dramatic music, which swells to triumphant climax, then peters out into sad, aimless jabs at a toy piano. Plink. Plinkety. Plink.)

Reader Comments (32)

I want to read your fiction.

Also, fock the job. You need to blog more.

P.S. Congratulations, grumble grumble.
July 14, 2004 | Unregistered Commentergetupgrrl
My income also depends on writing. Blogs take away time from important things and get us nowhere. My inability to give up my own blog just may ruin my life.

So I say: Screw us! Make money, write fiction. Become rich and famous. We give you nothing but momentary adulation and that's a check you can't cash.

People, don't be so damn selfish. Do not hold this woman back.

Besides, the internet is fickle, never forget that. They'll forget about you five minutes after you're gone. Not like fiction readers who will stalk you until you have to get a restraining order. I should also admit that as much as I think I love you I can't remember your name right now.

(Just kidding. We won't forget you for a really, really long time. And love is always momentary in a certain sense.)
July 14, 2004 | Unregistered CommenterMiel
How long till you're quoting Drew Carey?

"Oh, you hate your job? Why didn't you say so? There's a support group for that. It's called EVERYBODY, and they meet at the bar."

Just kidding, of course. Congrats and all that. But even so, working is highly overrated.
July 15, 2004 | Unregistered Commenterben
Ha! That's a pretty funny quote.
July 15, 2004 | Unregistered Commentersac
Well, well, we need to remind you about the poor dog that was held with the gun to it's head when our dear Mindy tried to leave us ? Well ? Do WE ?
July 15, 2004 | Unregistered CommenterJennifer
Actually, I've reconsidered my position about this.

Seriously. Finslippy -- do what's best for you.

The whole point of how much we all I care about returning to this blog is premised on a respect and affection for you and yours.

It would be a betrayal of that respect and affection if I insisted that you stay a dancing bear for my amusement instead of doing what's best for you and your family.

I'll still, y'know, check compulsively for updates. And if I ever get around to fixing my own sidebar you're still on it. But do what you think is best.

July 15, 2004 | Unregistered CommenterFrumDad
Um. I work. And there are no blackberries (although I'm not really sure what one of those are) or pumps (well, mainly because I can't walk in anything with a heel) but there is, yes, money.

So, I am happy that you will be receiving money because it is awfully pretty and fun to spend. I am also hoping you don't give up blogging completely because you are brilliant and make me laugh. And if you would write a book, I would buy it. So please don't stop writing.
July 15, 2004 | Unregistered CommenterDM

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